Monday, March 1, 2010

no chance

A. Life really is "like a box of chocolates" and everything is left up to chance.
OR
B. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

I cling to B.
It was written to us by the prophet Jeremiah. The Bible assures us that we are not far from God's thoughts. He created us, He knows our needs, and His Spirit even intercedes for us when we don't know how to pray.
Yesterday, we went back to the same church as last weekend. I am ready to get to know more people. I don't realize how much I miss my old acquaintances until I get out of this house and realize how many days have gone by that I haven't had anyone other than my family to talk to. I am an "introvert" in that I like my alone time and kind of re energize during those alone times, however, I am a woman and we all know we need girl friends! :) I praise God for my best girl friend out in MO, however I'm anxious for some new friends to go get a cup of coffee with or just to "do life" together here in my city. Being a pastor's wife, it's not that I got extremely close to anyone in our church, but I didn't realize how much the consistency of seeing the same people two times a week and getting into their lives on a surface level meant. I've equated this church loss with losing my child before and in this way it's almost worse (I said almost, but honestly nothing compared to that) because when we lost Nathan, those church members were the consistent things in our lives when we experienced loss. Now, the loss is of the consistency itself. I'm not sure that makes sense to you, but for me, a routine kinda gal, having something in the world steady when my world was rocked with the loss of our baby, was comforting. During that time, people couldn't believe I was out and about, at church, so soon after our loss. But, it was them that I needed. I needed to know that God didn't fall out of existence, that the world was still spinning, that life was going on. It helped me to crawl forward. Cooped up in my own little world would've just caused me to want to climb in bed and never come out. But, now, unfortunately what I relied upon to walk through my loss, has now been taken away.
Maybe that's a lesson in itself from this. I don't need to rely upon anything or anyone in the world, when I should know I have a God that has plans for us. We can have hope. And our lives are so much more than chocolates (sorry, Forrest).

1 comment:

Rebekah said...

This makes perfect sense. I cling to B also. Praying for you, blogging friend.