Wednesday, December 29, 2010

money, money, money

After "crying wolf" over the years of "not having money" to do this or that... I am ashamed to admit we're now the little boy whose sheep are being eaten by wolves, in a manner of speaking.
Lord, forgive us for our drama over the years, forgive us when we weren't content with all we had. Truth is, you've provided us with much more than simply our needs and still continue to provide for our needs now. Despite our perspective here, I trust that there's more to the picture that I can't see or figure out. We ask for your wisdom now, though. How do we tackle this?
We are sitting here with a few dollars in the bank and a whole lot of dollars owed out. My photography has been bringing in some solid additional funds these past few months, which has allowed us to live on hubby's reduced income, supplemented. Now that it is winter, and I had 5 of my 6 scheduled sessions cancel due to bitter cold weather and family illnesses, those extra funds are gone. We didn't realize how much we counted on them. Unfortunately, the way our mortgage works is, at the end of the year we either owe or receive the excess difference of actual and anticipated escrow expenses (taxes & insurance) from the previous year. This year we owe about 85 additional dollars in January's payment. 85 may not seem like a lot, but when living paycheck to paycheck, every penny is already accounted for. Where the pain really enters in is the pile of medical bills to pay, that honestly came to be because of one little ugly word, "stress."
I may have shared too much already, but am maybe just looking to confess our materialism (despite how "insignificant" it may seem from the world's standards) and for some accountability as we pursue strict budgeting and best use of what money we do have. We have a small "emergency fund" that would just cover the medical bills. It's so tough to know whether or not to drain that. I am afraid we won't have much choice, though, as each medical facility I called has minimum payments on their "payment plans." Somehow $200 a month for just one facility (out of the 6 that all need paying) isn't very reasonable to me...
So, Mr. H and I have some decisions to make. We have been plugging numbers into the Debt Quencher program, which can function like Dave Ramsey's "debt snowball." I think Dave would say drain the account, but I don't know if I'm ready to lose that safety net. But, how good is a safety net when the pile inside the net is so large?
Lord, this quicksand is swallowing me up. Today I ask for your guidance. Thank you for your faithfulness. Amen.

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