Tuesday, May 5, 2009

heavenly bodies

Preparing for the one year anniversary of my Nathan's death/birth coupled with my pastor's latest sermon on our future heavenly bodies has lead me to wonder how I will find Nathan when we reunite in heaven one day. I have let my mind wander over the magnificence of heaven and how we might (if we will) recognize one another. It makes me sad, and helpless in a way, to think that I don't even know how to imagine him. I spend time with my friend's child, born a week ahead of him, and see how she's progressed. It just makes the ache deeper as I realize just how much time really has passed. Her daughter has become such a little individual, learning to stand and babble. But, I don't know my son any other way than the infant he was. The 5lb 2.5oz little body that was in my arms for such a short, short time. Of the many in heaven, will he be present at my arrival? Who will place him in my arms? Will I be so drawn to the glory of God that I don't notice size, shape or age of those around me, just eventually aware of the presence of Nathan with me? Will I know who he is? I know we'll have heavenly bodies, but I have no idea how they age, if they age as compared to our age at death. Just one of the many questions about the mystery of heaven. :) I'm ok with not having all the answers. I'm ok with waiting.... waiting with faith and waiting in hope. But, in this melancholiness of a rainy morning, I'm also ok with posing these questions to my God and asking Him for the peace and patience to wait for the answers.

1 comment:

Amy said...

(((hug))) I'm so sorry. I pray that God will comfort you and give you insight on your questions.