Monday, March 2, 2009

NYMC 2

Still at NYMC...
I feel like the Lord is laying hurting kids on my heart, so I took the Helping Hurting Kids track this weekend. The enormity of it now weighs even heavier. The stories shared take me back to the days that I thought I wanted to work in the field of counseling. Maybe that's why there's still a bit of that desire within me. Maybe that's why the Lord had me major in psychology in college. In our ministry now, in our church, I am not aware of the magnitude of the hurts which must lie below in our students. We have had a few recent situations come to the surface, which beckoned me to help. Help, however, I also feel useless during some of those times.
It's an odd pull - I want to gather the girls in these hurting situations in my arms, throttle the parents (in most cases, where the hurt stemmed from - parental decisions: i.e. divorce) but also don't want to get "too pulled in" lest it disturb my own sense of balance in my life (just being honest here).
So here I sit now trying to make sense of all that I have been learning and also feeling throughout this conference. Where does He want me? Are there hurts that need ministering to within our group? How do I step in if I'm not aware of them?
I also feel a bit unqualified or un... unprepared.... my past is so blessedly clear of pain and hurt. While I did not grow up in an evangelical Christian home, my parents did encourage me to read the Bible and I learned the "basic" Bible stories and lessons. I was a "good girl" (until college when I realized it would take more than that to have eternal life in Heaven). How can I relate or how could I share my story in order for them to feel that I would even have a clue of what they might be feeling and experiencing? I know the Lord wouldn't lay a desire upon my life without Him guiding me and supplying me with all I need.
Praying for clarity as we head back home this afternoon.

2 comments:

Dana Delynn said...
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Dana Schmoyer said...

It was so great to meet you this weekend! It sounds like you got a lot out of it. I learned a lot, have lots of ideas running through my head of how to implement what I learned, and I absolutely loved connecting with people. This was my first National Youth Ministry Conference and loved it. Can't wait for next year!
How did the ptest go?