Loss

If you have arrived here due to your own experience of losing a child, I am truly sorry for your loss. There are so many words, yet at some moments not enough words, to even describe what you are feeling right now. Don't go under. Don't lose hope. Let me first quote the One who can help you walk this path, "You keep him in perfect peace who mind is stayed upon You, because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock." (this is from The Bible, Isaiah 26:3-4). I don't know what I would have done without my belief in God. Without the knowledge that He was the only rock in my world that couldn't get pulled loose. This loss wasn't something that He had done to me, but rather that He was walking through with me.

If you are looking for my story of loss, let me invite you to start with this journal entry from the "day before my world crashed" and then the next day. In short, I lost my son at 36 weeks into my pregnancy, without warning. There was no known cause, just simply a lack of enough amniotic fluid to sustain life.

After I lost my son, I took comfort in reading others' experiences like mine. Reading what they went through and felt helped me validate, for lack of a better word, my feelings. It was ok to feel scared that I'd forget him. It was normal that I would have higher highs and lower lows (all in the span of five minutes). The tremendous physical ache of my arms for my child was a common ache. If you are looking for more moms of loss, I found some great blogs through The Baby Loss Directory.

I also took comfort in music. These are some titles that helped me to grieve and also to heal. It is ok to be caught up in what could have been and cry. But it is also ok to put one step in front of the other and carry on with living. God gives us that ability, with His help. He feels our pain and only lets us go through this because He can see the other side and knows somehow, for some reason, it's necessary.

Lastly, if you are here because you know of someone that has lost a child, either before or after birth, please check out Heather's posts (1 & 2) on the best way to help a grieving mom. As a friend, you have been given an opportunity to serve and minister to that mom. What a gift you can be by being a friend during her confusing walk of grief.

If there is a specific question you'd like to ask or would like simply for me to pray for you, don't hesitate to contact me.