no more sugar!

Ok, now that I've had four days for it to sink in... I'll share the "bad" news. I have gestational diabetes. I've gone from "not fair!" to "waah" to "ok, let's deal" to "waah" again to "it's gonna be ok." LOL - if you didn't follow all that, bottom line is, while I still feel sort of clueless about it all, it's gonna be ok. :) God's hand is in everything, including this step of the pregnancy. I need to learn to eat better anyways :)
My numbers weren't overwhelmingly high, but high enough to warrant being sent to a diabetes class and monitoring my glucose levels daily. I go to the class on Thursday, so hopefully that will clear up a lot of my cluelessness. I've looked online a bunch and spoken with some friends that have battled gestational diabetes and some that have type 2 diabetes in their families. Since today was grocery shopping day (double-couponed it at Harris Teeter to save over $50, wooho!), I was able to look around for whole wheat, low-carb, no-sugar, etc. products. There really is more out there than I expected. And, unfortunately, what I did expect, some of it was more expensive. Anyways, I don't feel "expert" enough to discuss specifics of what gest. diabetes means yet, but here are some links to sites that I have been perusing. Please ADD SITES in the comments if you know of any good resources and I'll edit them in. Maybe someone (plus myself!) can benefit from the info.

Mayo Clinic's Overview of Gestational Diabetes
Gestational Diabetes Sample Menu
Fast Food Carb Counts
Diabetic Recipes

I do have to say, after looking at the list of "risk factors," it seems like my getting it is almost a no-brainer. I fit in 3 of the 6 categories. I hesitate to put them out here for fear of needlessly worrying some of you, especially if you have delivered a stillborn yourself, but I found it interesting:

These factors increase your risk of developing diabetes during pregnancy:

• Being overweight prior to becoming pregnant (if you are 20% or more over your ideal body weight)
• Family history of diabetes (if your parents or siblings have diabetes)
• Being over age 25 (check mark this one)
  
• Previously giving birth to a baby over 9 pounds (my daughter was 8lb 12oz/close)
  
• Previously giving birth to a stillborn baby (unfortunately, yes)
  
• Having gestational diabetes with a previous pregnancy
  

(as listed by the Cleveland Clinic)

I think in my "not fair!" period of emotion, the statistic from the American Diabetes Assoc. that "Gestational diabetes affects about 4% of all pregnant women - about 135,000 cases of gestational diabetes in the United States each year" seemed to stand out. Kind of like when I heard these stats: Only "1 in 160 births are stillbirths" (March of Dimes). And now I am also one of the "only" 4% of all pregnant women get gestational diabetes. Numbers mean nothing to me anymore. :) Sad, but true.
I'll have to post more after my diabetes class on Thursday. It'll be then that I get to learn about pricking my finger for glucose readings and all that good stuff. Til then... (remember, if you have any words of wisdom or resources to share, please comment below!)

eyelets, need any?

Free to someone who can use them...
Anyone out there need small eyelets? I am no longer scrapbooking and can't find another use for all of these. It's just a small ziploc of assorted colored eyelets.
Please, leave a message and I'll get these out to you.

sugar, sugar, are you my friend?

Well, three needle pricks down, one more to go. The time is moving relatively fast, considering the medical building that I am waiting in has free wifi! Nothing like having nothing to do but catch up on my Reader and email :) God is so good, yall. I slept horribly all night, but I felt fine this morning not eating. After getting Lynn to school and finally to the lab, the sugar drink went down (not easily, per se, but down). I drank 10 oz (I think) of fluid containing 100g of sugar! Shew. It was kinda thick this time. Apparently the first test only has 50g of sugar, but they up it for the three hour test. The ladies in the lab are so kind and aside from the multiple stickings (which is never fun regardless), my body is holding up. Little man is liking the sugar and has been constantly bumping and thumping around. On an empty stomach, it's not too comfy, but I'm glad to know he's reacting accordingly to his "food" this morning. Results should be back tomorrow, so we'll see what the next step will be then!

Wordless Wednesday - morning sight to behold

We were greeted with a rainbow upon waking up on Monday morning. Couldn't quite capture it's full beauty, but it was a pretty one, stretching across the sky!

²² Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.

²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

²⁴ I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."

²⁵ The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him

(Lamentations 3)

Tackle It Tuesday - consigning

To do: Go through baby girl clothes and pull out some to consign. Now that we know baby is a boy, there is just no way that we'll have room to store all of Lynn's past clothes (which are now in various totes and boxes in the closet and attic) plus future boy clothes! I'm not sure of the Lord's plans for our future regarding more children, so I don't want to get rid of everything quite yet. However, I definitely can pare down what we have saved of Lynn's.


Progress: Pulled out girl clothes and items from 0-18mos and have "tagged" them. (Now I just need Mr. H to get in the attic to bring down the 2T-4 sizes). Consignment sale is Sept 10th. Maybe I'll bring in a little bit of cash to cover the purchase of boy clothes (or diapers!) :)

sew done

Finished my baby burp cloths project! Cleared the sewing machine out of the baby's future room and now it's on to the next project... (stay tuned to see what that is tomorrow for my "Tackle It" post).

"hi mama"

Had such an unexpected blessing yesterday!! I got to see baby boy in an ultrasound. Woohoo! The seven weeks since my gender u/s has been forever ago. Talk about comforting. It was balm to soothe the soul. The most amazingly wonderful thing... he was uncharacteristically calm during the check... so during the course of the u/s when the "wand" thing was over his head, he turned to look right at it. He stared at me and blinked several times, while I watched him open his mouth and swallow fluid. Oh my goodness, it was as if he was like, "Hey mama. How's it going?" He just stared and stared, opening and closing those adorable eyes. I almost cried like crazy right there it was so sweet. He has the chubbiest little cheeks (that would be from me/my dad) that I could see right there on the screen as he tipped his head back. Of course... I also had her check to just "make sure" he was indeed a boy and there it was - confirmation. :)
What a huge blessing. Man, I love this kid. I sure can't wait to meet him on the outside.

safe?

Bought the new Britt Nicole cd yesterday and have been listening to it both yesterday and today. I kinda wrote the song "Safe" off as just having a good beat, but I didn't dig into it enough to really listen to the lyrics. I followed along using the cd jacket this morning and am copying two of the stanzas here for you to read...

(stanza 2)
I'm strong enough
I've always told myself
I never wanna need somebody else
But I've already fallen from that hill
So I'm dropping my guard,
Here's your chance at my heart and...

(stanza 3)
Everything you want, but it's everything you need
It's not always happy endings
But it's all the in-between
It's taken so long, so long to finally see
That your love is worth the risk
Oh, no
My walls are gonna break

You're not safe
and that's ok

My Jesus is my safe haven, but if you think about it, following Him isn't always that safe. It requires risks. It requires letting your heart go. It requires listening to Him when it goes beyond reason. It requires faith when sometimes the answers aren't clear. Heather from Mom4Life posted this on her facebook last night:

"A wife who loses her husband is called a widow. A husband who loses his wife is called a widower. A child who loses their parents is called an orphan. There is no word for a parent who loses a child... That's how awful the loss is." -Jay Neugeboren

Like Britt says, "It's not always happy endings, But it's all the in-between." God is there, through it all. He's personally walking me through the loss of a child, walking me through this following pregnancy, walking me through figuring out how to be a better wife and mom. His love is "worth the risk" even though it isn't always "safe."

Wordless Wednesday - spiderwebs

Isn't this crazy? We woke up to a morning of dense fog last week and came outside to find all of these spider webs on our front hedges. It looked something like a bad Halloween decoration or something. Our neighbors had them on their hedges as well. I wonder why?

but sugar is my friend!

Got a lovely phone call today... my levels from the initial glucose test are "elevated." Now I have to go back for the three hour test. Ugh. I haven't had to go through this yet. My other pregnancies showed normal levels and there was no possibility of gestational diabetes. Now I know I'm older with this one and have technically crossed into my "30's" but seriously. Surely my age is not a factor. I haven't done much research about gestational diabetes, so I don't know anything about markers or risks for it or anything. Honestly, I don't want to "borrow trouble" and worry about it until we cross that bridge. My test isn't until next Thursday. So, til then I will just take it day by day and continue to eat carbs and sugar! :) What's ridiculous is how I feel baby move and wonder if it's different than the last two, as if I should feel something different were I to have gestational diabetes.
Other pregnancy news... I get another ultrasound (finally!) at my next appointment. I'll be just-about thirty weeks and then will begin the nonstress tests twice weekly beginning at thirty two weeks. I am sooo ready to see this little guy again. I want confirmation with my eyes that my fluid levels are right on, that he is doing well, growing, all organs functioning, etc. At this point, baby is about 2 lbs and swallowing/processing fluid through his system (or so the books say). I praise God for bringing us to this point and continuing to guide me through the ups and downs, but I find myself asking Him for patience these days. Should I have the diabetes, I know these last months will be so unbelievably hard and long.

I find myself where Jadon Lavik sings:
"Comforter, provider, protector, friend. Here I am again, asking for your mighty hand to lead me once again." (song: "Just Like You")

Tackle It Tuesday - silver jewelry

Problem/Solution: I've been trying to clean my silver chains, but those little cleaning cloth wipes only go so far. I was asking my jeweler friend about the best way to clean them, and she surprised me with a container of silver jewelry cleaner. I have been cleaning like crazy. Now my silver jewelry is "sparkling"! I'm so excited!

Amish Friendship Bread

Just got my first experience with Amish Friendship Bread last week. Now I'm on day 6 and I had to add sugar, flour, and milk. I was a little surprised to reread the instructions and see that I was not to refrigerate it even after adding milk. We'll see...
Our church has a mission team out of the country right now and one of the members gave church staff starter bags before leaving. The idea behind it is to remember the team in prayer while you do each daily step. I thought it was a really neat idea and have been following through on the intent. From what I hear the bread at the end is very good as well :)
Anyone have any experience with this?

school time!

Time for a new school year! My Lynn started first grade this week. Crazy how time flies. Each day I look at her she seems to grow taller and act older. This year, her desk is in the front row, right next to the teacher's desk for now. Good placement... I'll expect lots of learning to take place with no distractions in the way :)
It was amazing how many items were on the supply list, shew. But, she's excited with her Disney princesses and Minnie Mouse folders, her new pencil box, bookbag, lunchbox, etc etc. As a girl, all of these things are of the utmost importance... I remember :)
She came home on the first day talking about all the new rules, activities and classroom "stuff." It was good to hear her chat about it. She's a talker, but at the conclusion of last year, she got to the point where she didn't really want to talk about school or her day. As a mom, I'm still trying to find that balance of letting her know I'm here to listen, but not hounding her for answers to get her to talk as soon as she gets in the car.
I'm looking forward to seeing all that God will do in her life academically, but more importantly spiritually, in her life this school year. "Father, guide my daughter in her studies this year. Help her to know that You are in each part of her life, even school learning. May she come to realize that she needs You as her Savior and her guide through life. Please be with Miss W and Mrs. S as they teach my child this year. May Your love shine through them and may they allow themselves to be used for Your glory this year. Amen"

transformation not managment

Doing some "research" on children and anger this morning. Beyond that statement would require a whole other blog post, which is not where I'm going today. But, I will ask for prayer for it... just for wisdom in raising this six year old kiddo of mine and the individual that she is.
Ok, so I read this article from Focus on the Family: Winning the War Against Anger. While this particular article is not specific to children, the gist behind the article really made me think. Go ahead and click the link first; it's a pretty short article and easy to read. :)

So. What do you think? I hadn't thought about it before, but I do think that today we are all about the "management" side of things and less about "change." We've socially accepted a behavior and rather than biblically attack it, we decide how to go "middle ground" so that both sides are happy. Jesus was not in to management, as the article states, but into transformation (Romans 12:2). Whether it is this article's particular topic of anger or another stronghold in our lives, transformation is not only just a possibility but a truth... "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" (Phil 4:13).
Think about it this morning. What do you need to give up to the Lord for the sake of transformation?

Wordless Wednesday - hydrangeas

The first and second are my from my parents' home.
The last is from mine.

Amazing what a difference in pH levels will do for hydrangeas!

For more WW, see 5M4M.

Tackle It Tuesday - backyard minimakeover

To do: backyard mini-makeover: clean out and clean up!
Result: much better! :)

BEFORE:
















AFTER:





















More Tackles at 5M4M.

25 wks.

As I sit here, I notice I'm having a braxton hicks contraction. Wasn't sure I was going to start those this early, but I guess, as they say about subsequent pregnancies - you start things earlier with each one. I'd have to look up to see when I started having them with Nathan. Funny thing is I had been having these with Lynn for several weeks but didn't know they were contractions until I was hooked up to a monitor one day (about three weeks before her due date) because I had been spotting (which turned out just being due to having an internal exam earlier that day at the dr.) Anyways, it opened my eyes to what a contraction was. Honestly, because I was induced with both my kiddos, I haven't yet felt what it's like to have contractions get progressively worse and have to go through the traditional "labor" processes of timing them, calling the doctor, deciding when to drive to the hospital, etc. With Nathan, I actually had some rough ones for a period of about 30 minutes one afternoon after work. But, with drinking some water and laying down, they eventually went away. So, for these bhc's I'm just being a good girl with my feet up and slurping down some water.
I feel so run down lately. I haven't been sleeping well at all. Dreams and discomfort keep me from getting what I feel is "restful, quality" sleep. I wake up aching in my hips and my mind still reeling from the ridiculous dreams. There's no pattern to the dreams - some of them have to do with current events in my life, but others are random. Some are disturbing, others are normal events. I feel like I've been pregnant forever. We found out we were preggo with Nathan in Oct. '07, so between his pregnancy, the nine months in between his loss and the beginning of this one, plus these 5/6 months of this one, it's amounting to FOREVER. :) My arms almost ache with a desire to hold my baby. I just keep giving this up to the Lord and pray for His arms around me. He's so faithful and so constant - I can almost feel His hand holding me up sometimes through those periods when my emotions and thoughts run away like that. We have had youth leader and youth events all weekend where we've had three babies in attendance... the three that were born around Nathan's time. So watching them walk, crawl, chatter, splash in the pool have also stirred up thoughts of Nathan more recently. Thoughts of Nathan lead to thoughts of this little man and well, that's where I go and crave holding this little one, alive in my arms. Fifteen weeks to go until his due date. One week at a time, riding on the goodness of my God!

party

Lynn's birthday party was on Friday. Kept it pretty simple this year - six girls for this sixth birthday. They decorated flip flops (as seen above) and then played out in a kiddie pool and slip-n-slide, as well as on the swing set. It was fun to see how each girl decorated her flips. Some went with ribbons and flowers, while others just peeled and stuck foam cutouts. Some put cutouts on the flat "foot part" of the flip flop, while others just stuck to the plastic cross pieces. Cute. Reminded me just how individualistic we all are - even at the ages of 4-6. The drama that played out that day also reminded me of that fact. Where there are girls, there is drama, even during a two hour birthday party :) . The part that made me smile the most was watching them all sit around in the pool with their tea cups and plates having a "tea party" with some of the play food and dishes we brought out. Too cute. So civilized in that moment :)
All in all, the prognosis at the end of the day was "I had fun, mama."

up and awake

Just another typical morning in the H household...

husband... at the gym (as opposed to bike riding this morning - too wet outside)

daughter... playing on the computer (Disney at the moment, although there are better sites out there - what are your child's favorites? any recommendations? We just found this one the other day and it's very simple to navigate & more educational: ABCya!)

me... searching online for some places to find some decorative (outdoor) urns or large pots for flowers, for my back patio - before Lynn's bday party tomorrow. I just got a 15% off coupon through my Home Depot Garden Club email, so I might try there, but there's also a Garden Ridge nearby that I haven't yet explored, but heard is good for things like that. Mr. H surprised me by finishing cleaning out our back patio area, but it needs some color to warm things up! I'll share some pics when we're done.

I'm looking forward to Lynn's bday party tomorrow. She's so excited to see friends and I think I'm just as excited to see their mommies! :) We're having a small, all-girl party here in the backyard. The best thing about summer birthdays is the ability to have kids and water together for a fun time! We'll start by decorating flip flops - we got some girly ribbon, jewels, and flowers to dress them up. Then they'll just water play for awhile and then make ice cream sundaes and open presents. Very laid back, but hopefully fun for her and her friends. So, before all that goes down, in addition to finding pots, I need to vacuum and clean the bathrooms. :) Glamorous activities for today, eh?

Wordless Wednesday - middle school manicure

My middle school girls tied me down (ok, not really - I actually consented to this!) and gave me a "middle school manicure" at camp!

More WW here at 5M4M.

happy

Taking an idea from Jo-Lynne @ Musings of a Housewife this afternoon and completing a meme.

6 Unimportant Things that Make Me Happy

1. A glass of ice cold water in the morning with my cereal.
First thing in the morning with my cereal (I eat it dry w/ no milk), nothing is more satisfying.

2. A clutter-free living room.
This room is the "dump zone" for all things in our life, it seems. To be able to walk in to a clutter-free living room, I feel like I can actually sit and relax in the room, whether it's with a book or on the laptop.

3. A new purse or tote.
Need I explain more?

4. Having a plan for dinner.
Most days are planned out, but at those "in between" shopping trip/payday weeks, I think that we'll have leftovers, but we don't and so the fridge is bare. I do not like cooking, so being creative is not "fun" to me.

5. Having an extra dollar or two in my wallet to pick up a surprise for my daughter or hubby.
This could be surprise milkshakes on the way home from school with my daughter or a redbox rental for me and my hubby at night.

6. A good night's sleep.
With this pregnancy, I haven't been sleeping the best, so a night without tossing is sure to make my day better.

How about you? Be sure to leave your link in a comment if you post your list!

mercy

A little confession: James 2:13b is on my dresser this week.
"Mercy triumphs over judgment."

As the last few days of summer vacation wind down... as my family is back home for a "normal" week this week... as the preggo hormones kick in... (oh, I can come up with all sorts of excuses, can't I?)... I find myself being quick to anger versus slow to speak and judging when I should be giving mercy. How quickly I fall to the desires of the flesh. My reminder for myself this week is to love. To simply reach out with the hand of God and extend the same mercy that was extended to me on the cross.
Our family verse tonight was Romans 8:32: "He who did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all—how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?" God takes care of every need. Talk about mercy! With a gracious heart, I too, need to extend such mercy... from my daughter to the stranger in the Walmart line. Jesus died for all.